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My Blog Is an Awesome Blog.
These days, seems like everyone has a blog. Well, this one’s mine.

Rafting down the San Lorenzo

25 July 2010  4:34 pm   Comments (1)

Great Idea #005

Xxxx \ ʒʒʒʒ \ n: any word that rhymes with the word in question

For example, a xish means or refers to any word that rhymes with fish. Dish is a xish, for example, as are swish and Gish. Telephone is a xelephone. Shoe is a xhoe where through is a xough, but bough is a xough, and cow, of course, is a xow. All xxxxs (e.g. xish, xelephone, etc.) start with ‘X,’ which ‘X’ is pronounced ‘ʒ,’ i.e. a voiced palato-alveolar fricative, e.g. the ‘S’ in Asia or casual. Casual is a xasual, which is fun. Gearbox is a xerox* (NB the lower-cased ‘X’ (Xerox is also a xerox)), and if there were such a thing as a xenophobia aside from xenophobia, it would look the same in print and/or on screen as xenophobia, but would be pronounced differently. Xxxx is spelled with four ‘X’s to avoid confusion with xxx, which has connotations. As far as pronunciation goes, the duration or extension of the ʒ is sort of up to the speaker.

*A near-xerox, actually.

22 June 2010  11:56 pm   Comments (0)

California Northern Magazine: A New Regionalism

California Northern Magazine is a biannual publication exploring the region’s cultures, environments, histories, and identities. It provides a rare California-based forum for exceptional essays, long-form journalism, literature, and photography, and distinguishes itself from traditional regional media by balancing its local emphasis with a level of sophistication and depth typically found in larger national publications.

www.calnorthern.net

cnm1-cvr

7 June 2010  6:57 pm   Comments (0)

Described Comic #003

We have a stand-up comic saying something like, “No, I love women. I do.” Typical stand-up rhetoric. With the pauses and the wry demeanor. “But man,” he says. “What’s with all the shoes? Am I right, guys?” A man in the audience leans over and whispers to his friend, also male, beet-red and practically asphyxiating with laughter, “He’s right. My wife has like fifty, sixty pairs of shoes, easy.”

7 May 2010  9:07 pm   Comments (0)

State License Plates Spotted While Honeymooning, August 2009

2 April 2010  9:33 am   Comments (0)

Great Idea #004

Can you shake a beer can or a coke can or any soda or carbonated beverage in an aluminum can hard enough so that the pressure just builds and builds and eventually just pops? Just bursts the hell open? I’d like to build a machine that aims to find this out. A machine that shakes aluminum cans at an astonishing rate/with astonishing violence and vigor, and just see what happens next.

1 March 2010  10:17 pm   Comments (0)

Three Fairy Tales I Wrote When I Was a Kid

- 1 -

Once upon a time, in the woods deep under all the brambles their was a castle that belonged to an ogre. Everyone would tell storys like: All of the kings knights and the Emperor's best warriors tried to kill the ogre but every time someone went to the ogre's castle he would never come back, and every body beleved the storys . But one day one of the emperors strongest and bravest warrior went up to the castle in the woods and saw that the castle did not belong to an ogre at all it was completly emty. He started to run back to the castle but then he stoped dead in his tracks there was the ogre. " what are you ", the warrior didn't wait to hear the the  rest he pulled out his sword and stabed the ogre and the ogre ran far into the woods and was never seen again and as for the warrior he just walked back to the castle.

- 2 -

CINDERELLA
chapter # 1

Once  upon a time there was a girl named Cinderella. She lived with her stepmother and stepsisters. Anistasha and Derazella.Cinderella's stepmother was so jelus of Cinderella's beauty that she was forsed to be a maid in her own house.
chapter#2 One day while Cinderella was working a mesinger came to the door.Cinderella opened the door "this is for you", said the mesinger "thank you" said Cinderella "What dose it say"  ,said Ciderella's friends the mice "i'll read  it "  it says tonight there will be a ball "OH WOW! a ball cried the mice "shhhhhhhhh"  , said cinderella they'll hear you "who'll hear us?"answered the mice but it was to late.The stepsisters were alredy braging about ther waht they call beautyful clothes
chapter #3
Then the night came and cinderella was so busy working she forgot all about it. the rest of the family left  hoping to leave Cinderella  at home but the mice saw them  "Cinderella ," The called "the ball" Cinderella started to run out but then she looked at her clothes she was so sad she ran out into the garden and started to cry .Then her feiry god mother came "You can and will go to the ball  ",said the feiry godmotther.
"all I need is, a pumkin a dog, a horse and a couple of mice" Cinderella gave her feiry godmother the things.and she turned them into a coach ,a footman a driver and a couple of hores.

And then she went to the ball .When Cinderella got there she saw many other maids, but when the prince saw Cinderella that was the only maid he would dance whith.they danced and danced until the clock strok 12 Cinderella had to run but luckly she losed one of her glass slipers, that chered the prince up
chapter #4 the next morning the prince looked all over the place but he could not find anyone who fit the sliper then he came to Cinderella's house the to ugly stepsisters tried it but it did not fit then Cinderella tried it one and it fit! her and the prince were maryed and they lived in the castel happly ever after.

- 3 -

Once upon a time there was a Little Red Riding Hood .Her grandmother was not feeling well so Little Red Riding Hood had go to her house to bring some goodies to her.

On the way she met a wolf "good evening",said the wolf "where  are you going"?   'To grandmothers house "I know a short -cut to grandmothers  house'.'

little red riding hood obeyed the wolf. The wolf ran to grandmothers house and tied her up .

Then the wolf put on grandmothers clothes and jumed into her bed then little red riding hood ran inthe door she was surprised "Why grandmother what big teeth you have ."the wolf jumped out of bed''THE BETER TO EAT YOU WITH! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! BUT THEN THE WOOD CUTER CAME AND KILLED THE WOLF! and rescued grandmother.

They lived happily ever after      the end.

19 February 2010  6:42 pm   Comments (2)

Described Comic #002

Two men at a bar. The man on the left is overweight and has an open pack of cigarettes behind him; also a rocks glass with liquid. He stands with his back to the bar, leaning, legs crossed at the ankle, a cigarette balanced insouciantly between two fingers as smoke issues forth from his face like a floodgate. The man on the right is slim and wearing a smart coat plus striped scarf, some hard shoes just visible in the dim shadow of the bar stools. Because of the crop, we can’t see anyone to the left of the larger man, nor anyone to the right of the slim man. Still, by the way this latter is turning his head to the left, his back to the viewer, we can infer that he’s there at the bar with someone else, some companion, who has either paused long enough in conversation for this slim man to turn and look over his shoulder, or else has run to the head real quick or something. The larger man has a speech bubble that says, “This is my diet plan. Tobacco is an appetite suppressant. Or nicotine is.” In profile, we see the thin man’s expression, a bit smug, a bit patronizing. His bubble says, “Mmm. Is it working?” Smoke is sort of creeping along the floor of the bar, like false fog.

23 January 2010  11:48 am   Comments (1)

Albums of the Decade

1. Modest Mouse - The Moon & Antarctica  (2000)
2. Broken Social Scene - You Forgot it in People  (2002)
3. Radiohead - In Rainbows  (2008)
4. A Silver Mt. Zion - Born into Trouble as the Sparks Fly Upward  (2001)
5. Eminem - The Marshall Mathers LP  (2000)
6. Panda Bear - Person Pitch  (2007)
7. Liars - Drum’s Not Dead  (2006)
8. Wilco - Yankee Hotel Foxtrot  (2002)
9. Animal Collective - Feels  (2005)
10. Battles - Mirrored  (2007)
- - -
Spoon - Gimmie Fiction  (2005)
Sigur Rós - ( )  (2002)
Interpol - Turn on the Bright Lights  (2002)

16 December 2009  2:53 pm   Comments (3)

Best of 2009

1. Animal Collective - Merriweather Post Pavilion
2. Grizzly Bear - Veckatimest
3. Atlas Sound - Logos
4. Dirty Projectors - Bitte Orca
5. Phoenix - Wolfgang Amadeus Phoenix
- - -
St. Vincent - Actor

Song: Animal Collective - My Girls
Best of 2009 Mix

Previous years’ lists

  2:52 pm   Comments (2)

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